Vent

I am having a rough week.

First, after weighing in this morning... there is still a 3 lb gain. I honestly have no idea why. I certainly did not over eat enough to gain 3 lbs. In fact, there was no over eating at all. I have been sticking to 1500 calories and have been going to the gym. All I know is that it sucks.

On top of this, my parents are upset about my wedding plans. Okay, I should clarify. My mom is happy for me... but my dad and stepmom? Not so much.

In the beginning, my stepmom told me what a great idea it is that M and I are going away to get married. Less expensive, less stress, etc. Now, she takes every opportunity to tell people how unhappy they are about it. Oh, and my dad is "hurt" he won't be walking me down the aisle. This is where I should mention, he didn't even pick up the phone to congratulate me on my engagement. It wasn't until we celebrated my stepmom's birthday a month later that he said something to me about it.

Here is the thing. I have always bent over backwards to to try to please my dad and stepmom and lately, they find something wrong in everything I do. I should also mention the fact that my mom and dad do not get a long at all. Seriously. It's that bad. They can't even be in the same room without fighting. Do you see how a traditional wedding has the potential of becoming a disaster? They have been divorced for 23 years, and frankly the way they act (mainly my dad and stepmom) is ridiculous. It's ridiculous that after that many years, they can't be civil to each other. You would think they would be able to put things aside for one day, but I have no confidence that would happen. I would spend the entire day worrying about who is uncomfortable, who is going to argue with each other, etc. That is a huge reason for my decision to not have a traditional wedding.

In addition to that, M and I would be paying for the wedding. Right now, there are so many other things we can use that money for, the biggest thing is fixing up our house so we can sell it in the next year or so. We have already put quite a bit of money into it this year and that is only going to continue. Weddings are so expensive and I can't justify spending $20,000 or more on a wedding (for ONE DAY!) when we can use that for other things that are going to benefit us in the long run.

I have been trying to include my dad and stepmom. I told them about the resort and sent them pictures. I emailed my stepmom a picture of my wedding dress. All that was said was "that's nice." Not once have they asked any questions or even pretended to be excited for me. This makes me not want to mention another word about it to them. I know that is not the right attitude to have, but it's the way I'm starting to feel. My stepmom also thinks it is ok to put my sister in law in the middle of it.

I feel like this is such unnecessary stress. M and I shouldn't have to explain our decision to anyone, yet we have and we're still getting crap for it. I'm not a selfish person, but I feel like I get to be a little selfish when it comes to my wedding. This is about M and I and no one else. We aren't having a wedding for my parents. It's about the two of us and no one has the right to be telling us what we have decided is the wrong way to do it.

I'm done venting. Hope you are having a better week than me!!